zucchinis:

wake up disney

irresponsibleeyouth:

The trick is to not let people know how really weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

dieceased:

remember that one time you called your teacher mom

(Source: butthorn)

e-zekiel:

okay so today I was at the mall and this girl walking in front of me and tripped and fell and instead of helping her up like a normal person would- I decided to make her feel less embarrassed and fall down too

but I guess another guy had the same idea because we fell at the same time

and then another person fell

and another

and suddenly I was lying in the middle of an impromptu fainting mob and a lot of people were shouting

and the girl who’d originally fallen looked so fucking happy

azulaang:

older-aang:

theinvisiblemonsters:

abukkitofcelestialintent:

do people actually stand in front of a microphone for hours making weird gibberish sounds for them to use in the sims games

because if so then i need to see this happen at least once in my lifetime

if not more

well you’re in luck then

THAT. LAUGH.

Katie Perry was also one those fools too

side effects of being friends with me include gaining extensive knowledge of tv shows you dont watch or care about

gatzzby:

hannahsneakers:

why don’t they have big hyped up award shows for books

i mean

best male/female character

best antagonist

best plot development

best plot twist

come on

#book you threw across the room the hardest

nyehridan-artpora:

lalulutres:

worried that squirrels were eating all the birdseed, so we set up a camera

i do not think that is a squirrel

10moonymhrivertam:

bcperfect:

maybe the reason why some of us stay up all night and sleep all day is because we were meant to live on the other side of the planet

….This makes a disturbing amount of sense…

rydek:

this girl on my facebook feed has been posting statuses for 8 hours straight all today begging for someone to kill a spider in her bathroom and having several breakdowns in the middle and ranting about how she has no true friends because no one would kill it only to realize that it was a piece of hair and i’m still laughing

(Source: relatable-pics)

richwhitelesbian:

we need some new and more powerful swears

ambassador-of-anguish:

shouldertappingghosts:

If I was a famous author I would publish a book with ten different endings which all went to print with varying degrees of rarity, but not tell the fans about it so that I could watch their confusion as they disagree over how the story ended. Then when they figured it out I would ‘come clean’, telling them that I had released eleven alternate endings and watch them panic again as they all try to find the last ending.

This is perfect.